I will cry, if you die..choychoychoy~

I've been frequently asked by people that.." If i die, will you cry for me?" Usually my reply would be.." why so random one.." then reassure them that nothing will go wrong..they'll be safe etc etc

Well..i have to say..i haven been through much 生离死别 in my life..all my loved ones are living happily somewhere in this world..=) the only one in my whole 19 years of life that i've experienced is my grandfather's death several years ago..he died of cancer anw..it's a long term treatment..so everyone was mentally prepared for it..

To me..i haven't really give it much thoughts and considerations if someone were to pass on and leave me eternally..that's because i'm being pampered in my own world where everything is simple and peaceful..where i don't experienced much of these kind of 生离死别de pain..

I do hear from my friend's friend that is dying from leukemia..i do hear from my friend's friend who died just by falling down the stairs..

But none of these has happened to those that are directly related to me..yes~..i'll feel upset for them when they talk about it..but somehow i'm pretty lost for words facing this kind of situation..to me..those are the scenarios that i would see in drama/newspaper instead of happening on me..=.=..i know i sound stupid/naive or unrealistic..but this is really what i felt like..

I mean..life's so fragile..so unpredictable..like there might some deadly brain tumour growing in someone's head right now..or maybe..someone will die tmr due to drink driving etcetc..i'm just starting to wonder how will i react if it did happen actually..what if someone i care about were to leave suddenly..i know i'll cry..but crying is the least helpful option i can choose to do..the last thing i want is for others to get even more bothered/upset by my annoying crying..Maybe i'll feel remorseful for what i should have done for him / her while i have the chances...to tell him/her how much i need them..to let them know how much i love them etcetc

The tears can be flowing deep inside..crying is not the only way to show that you care..

There's always people saying "Live life like there's no tmr"..but..isn't that too tiring?

It's pretty unpractical..because when u wake up the next day..there's still a "tmr" awaiting~

SO..If i ever leave..don't cry for me..=)